I’ve been waiting for a friend to finish up some work I’m
having him do for me, and getting annoyed that he has been dragging it on for
months. I knew I would see him yesterday and wanted to say something like,
“Dude, you ever going to finish it up?” but thought better about it. When I saw
him he didn’t look like himself and his posture and expression looked defensive
or perhaps angry. I said, “How’s ____ (his wife).” I thought that was the best
way to approach him since she is pregnant and he is excited about it. He said,
“Alright” without any real expression. But that wasn’t what was on his mind. He
apologized for not finishing his job for me, then proceeded to tell me that he
just discovered his 8-year-old son has been molesting younger kids. My friend
had gotten full custody of his son when he was 5 after his ex-wife’s boyfriend
had physical abused him, but what my friend didn’t know then and only now
discovered - to his horror - is that the physical abuse was part of sexual
abuse. It turns out that the abuser was also abused as a child. Sadly, it is
well documented that sexual abuse like this is passed on to the next
generation. We talked about it for some time and I finished with, “I pray, you
know. I’ll pray for you, ____(his son), and your family.” He’s not a religious
guy, but he said he has been praying too.
I guess you always think these things happen to other people
until they happen to us.
